being female

I first passed by these words a few years back, and now I'd like to share it here.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE

..one old love
she can imagine
going back to...
and one who reminds
her how far she has come...

..enough money within her
control to move out and
rent a place of her own
even if she never wants
to or needs to...

..something perfect to wear if
the employer or date of her dreams
wants to see her in an hour...

..a youth she's content
to leave behind...

..a past juicy enough that
she's looking forward to
retelling it in her old age...

..a set of screwdrivers,
cordless drill, and a black
lace bra...

..one friend who always makes
her laugh... and one who lets
her cry...

..a good piece of furniture
not previously owned by anyone
else in her family..

..eight matching plates, wine
glasses with stems, and a recipe
for a meal that will make her
guests feel honored..

..a feeling of control over
her destiny...


EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW

..how to fall in love without
losing herself...

..how to quit a job,
break up with a lover,
and confront a friend
without ruining the friendship...
and how to change a tire...

..when to try harder...
and when to walk away...

..that she can't change
the length of her calves,
the width of her hips,
or the nature of her parents...

..that her childhood may not
have been perfect...
but its over...

..what she would and wouldn't
do for love or more...

..how to live alone...
even if she doesn't like it...

..whom she can trust,
whom she can't,
and why she shouldn't
take it personally...

..where to go...
be it to her best friend's kitchen table..
or a charming inn in the woods...
when her soul needs soothing...

..what she can and can't
accomplish in a day..
a month...and a year...

..why they say
life begins at 30...


yes, very true indeed...
-moenlite-
[looking back and wondering...]

on a night like this

Had a nice small family reunion when I was home last week. Wasn’t really planned for actually, yes...things just seemed to fall into place.

My eldest brother and family was in town, my second brother arrived in time (his wife is still in Jakarta at the moment, finishing her masters), unfortunately my third brother had to miss this, but luckily his wife and son have not yet flown out so they were there. Plus...my cousin and her family was unexpectedly there (though reason being an unfortunate one_her father in law passed away, God rest his soul_their presence was truly a long awaited one); and of course my other cousins and uncle and aunts in Jakarta that I truly miss and love to meet every time I get a chance to.

The night was lovely.
If one were to noticed closely, they'd realize that those present were actually a mix of both my mom and dad’s side, without really being able to tell the difference. Even I had always assumed it was all one big family and not a combination of two. When I was younger I had assumed this was because both my parents come from the same place, and had sort of known each other’s family. But come to think of it, the more I noticed that even as my family expanded (with 'new' family members originating from various places), that blend was still there. And I truly feel grateful for that. No *this is from my mom’s side, I’m closer to them*-*this is from my dad’s side, I’m closer to them* kind of issues. Thank God :)
Well, I hope its not too ambitious to wish that I can someday pass that on to my future generation, who knows :)

-moenlite-
[still sensing the delicious nasi uduk and dishes from that night...hmmmm :)]

growing up

Maturity is to be able to bear injustice without trying to get even....

My dear cousin passed on these words to me a few days ago, when we happened to meet under unexpected circumstances. These were just the words I needed to hear I guess.

No, it’s not about anyone I’ve ever mentioned here. But, yes I believe I have been injustice-d several times by the same persons recently, at least these recent ones were the hardest hits. And it wasn’t pretty. I know that some would just cut their friendship loose, since of course there are other much nicer people worth befriending with in this world. But it wasn’t that easy, this situation was a bit sticky, plus...the ugly part already took place.

So, I took that last shot on ‘maturity’, without loosing my pride, and wrote those long awaited words to come through. Short and simple.

And I felt good, mission completed. Now whatever response I get, is out my hands, and definitely not worth thinking about.
And at least now I know better. Yes, believe me, I’ve learnt my lesson.

-moenlite-
[listening to those tunes...]

*picture, by Jan Cook